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How to eat: takeaway while under coronavirus lockdown

You’re trapped at home and you fancy ordering in. Should you use a delivery app? How do you tip? Do you need starters? And is being able to order precisely what you want, even now, a fundamental human right?

Loth as How to Eat (HTE) is to break the fourth wall, it will come as no surprise to learn that this month’s topic is not what was originally planned. Over the years, HTE has stood firm against some implacable foes: people who put mayo on bacon butties, those who refuse to accept whipped cream with scones, but even it must bend in the whirlwind that is a global pandemic.

April had been marked down as the month HTE would consider Kate Bush’s favourite breakfast, shakshuka (think about it). But with going for a leisurely brunch now a remote possibility, HTE must pivot indoors and consider what – for those who can still afford it– has become the highlight of the food week: the takeaway.

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